Emmie and I went out on a date last night to the circus and it was so fun. I've never been before and either has she so Darren told me he'd put the other girls to bed if I wanted to take her. I loved seeing her so excited to do something special with just mommy. She is such a crazy kid but when I get to spend some one-on-one time with her it just makes me appreciate and love her so much more. She's so smart and witty and cracks me up with the things she says. On a day to day basis it's so hard to be able to pay enough attention to all the things she says because she talks nonstop and I have 2 other kids to deal with so it's nice to get these hours with her that she knows she's number one and gets your undivided attention.
So I have needed to start relaxing a bit as a mom and I'm still unsure of how I feel about it so give me some opinions here. I think I have been more of a helicopter parent with Emmie just because she's my first and so everything is always new but she has gotten to where she is very friend oriented. I don't care that she loves playing with her friends because she is very social and always has been but she ALWAYS wants to play outside with them and I just can't be out there every second. So before I was always telling her no. We would have friends come over but not play out front much. There are a ton of kids her age who play right out in front of our house everyday and I was always feeling bad that she would stare out the window begging to go out to play. So finally one day we reiterated the whole stranger danger talk, went over where her boundaries were on the street and how she can't go into anyone's houses and what not, and I let her out to play. The first day I was looking out the window every 5 seconds but now I look out about every 5-10 minutes or I will let her play out there for a bit while I'm finishing something up and then go out and sit out front while she plays with the other kids. I know I was roaming the whole neighborhood alone at her age but I just feel like she is so young! So am I doing an ok thing here even letting her go out to play by herself for short periods of time or do I need to shorten the leash for a while until she's older? I'm so paranoid of protecting her but at the same time I don't want to be the overbearing crazy mom who never lets their kids out of their site and stiffles them. She's so dang cute with her little buds though. I snuck this picture through the window of her and a few of her friends the first day she went out to play. haha I'm a nerd I know
12 comments:
that is so cute you guys went to the circus together! I wish we had a circus here too. Just my opinion about the playing outside by herself thing. How old is she? I cannot remember. I want to say 6. I would say NO. Yes I am very paranoid and get more so, especially hearing about kidnappings on the news. That is my WORST fear of what might happen to my girls. It only takes a second of not watching and they can be snatched so fast and they are so little and the horrible guy is so big. Of course at any age they can be taken but I would wait till they are at least 10 to be out alone. Yes we got to play outside too when I was a lot younger and my mom was not out there but things are so different. That is just me though. I am sure you will do whatever you feel is best for your girls. Good luck girly!!
What a nice husband you have. Bonus points for Darren!
The circus looks like it was lots of fun. Somehow, Emmie looks more grown up in each post.
Emmie is a very social girl--I was surprised at how friendly she was right at first when we saw her last. No hiding behind the couches, just sat right next to me and started telling me about the guy she was going to marry.
We weren't allowed to play out front growing up, but we also lived on a busy street with lots of speeders.
Maybe you could install a video camera like our neighbors so you could keep a constant eye on her. =) Still, I agree with the comment above, it only takes seconds for something bad to happen.
Woops!
I totally agree with you guys about the only taking a second thing and that is obviously what my fear as a mom always is but I'm also not into the whole idea that things are more dangerous now than they were when we were kids. Statistically kidnapping crimes have actually gone down but I think that since we now have national media, where as things used to be more local news, we get more scared.
I really, really liked hearing what the mom who let her kid ride the subway had to say about letting her son do it, did you guys ever hear about her? She was all over the news as the world's worst mom. I thought it was such a crock. She prepared her kid for it, talked to him a lot about it and then let him do it. She didn't just throw him out of a train and say good luck. Although I would probably never go to those lengths with my kids I still applauded her for not letting her own fears and anxieties get in the way of her child growing and being mature enough to handle something.
It's just so hard to be a mom sometimes and knowing what's best for your kids and what to do to keep them save but also not rub off your own fears on them. I'm terrified of water and have nightmares about my kids drowning all the time but I won't keep them out of the water just because they could drown. I dunno, I'm still uneasy about her playing outside by herself but I keep checking on her and she is obeying the rules everyday and we role play almost every day with talking about, what if a stranger says hey your dad told me to come pick you up, what do you do. What if someone tries to pick you up and put you in their car, what if they say hurry get in my car your mommy's hurt I'll take you to her... instead of being afraid I think it's instilled a confidence in her that she can make herself safe instead of relying on me all the time to protect her.
Gosh who'd have thought when we first decided to make these little families we would be faced with so many things to think/worry about huh. Thanks for your comments guys. Do they still have that camera up Becky? haha Have they come over acting all weird again?
What an awesome hub! Those pictures of you and Em are so cute! How fun you two could have a date together and the circus, that's every kids dream, I'm sure!
You are exactly like I was with Emmie. Don't worry about being a protective parent, it's better than the alternative. She is your first and it's amazing how things will change in the next 5 years! Enjoy them this little, which I'm sure you already do!
LOVE the post!!! How fun and sweet and cute! You are such a great Mom!!!
love the pics of emmie and Lyza. So cute!! And love the fruit bouquet. What is your love language by the way? What is Darren's?
Lynette- I've never heard of the love language thing so I googled it and took a quiz from 2 different sites. One said my language was words of affirmation but the other one said acts of service... hmm so I don't know. And Darren's never taken it so I don't know his. I'll have to have him take it for curiosity sake
I LOVE the circus and no you are not a bad mom to let her go a little. You did the perfect thing setting boundaries and then let her go. Perfect!
Oh my goodness gracious, do you have five children?!?!?! Wow... you're such a cute mom and your kids are adorable! Congratulations
haha nooooo I don't have 5 kids, I have 3 girls
Oooo, I absolutely love chocolate covered strawberries... Go Darren! You lucky girl. How awesome that you were able to go on a date with Emmie to the circus. How fun!
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